Chapter 3.17

The two lovebirds head over to Evergreen Harbor to meet June’s parents.

When they arrive at her parent’s apartment, Junes explains, “This is not their accurate place of residence, my favorite human fiance. They acquired it by exterminating the residences.”

Zolnax rolls his eyes. “We’ll have to put a stop to that. If your parents terminate ALL the residences, then I can’t take over the world.”

The guy in front of Zolnax freaks when he overhears him.

(Can’t say I blame you, dude. If I were you, I’d move. NOW! 👀👽)

Zolnax whips out his phone. “Note to self: Tell June’s parents not to threaten, extort, or kill anyone since that’s my job.”

(Good Lord…this generation. ***smh*** 🤦‍♀️)

When they enter, June announces, “Male and Female progenitor, this is Zolnax Rex, whom will incubate my future offspring.”

Zolnax throws them his cheesiest smile. “Delighted to meet you both.”

The two do not seem too impressed. They both glare at him.

June’s mom asks in her electronic voice, “You are willing to have future offspring implanted in the male protractsis? This is highly unusual. Most human males are opposed. What is your ulterior objective?”

Zolnax smiles, trying to put them at ease. “I-I’m in love with your daughter. I wish to make her happy.”

June’s dad’s eyes tighten. “Irrational. Male humans do not give their bodies for incubation without a mind wipe. There must be another nefarious ambition.”

Zolnax cocks his head. “I can assure you, sir, that humans will do things for the sake of love that they might not otherwise.”

June’s mother nods. “This is true, Maxim. I have seen this on the rectangular wall object. Humans are not very intelligent creatures, after all. They are guided by their libido.”

At this June beams. “Zolnax’s libido is quite strong, my progenitors. I can attest to that!”

(OMG! She’s talking to her parents about her sex life like it’s what she had for dinner! 🙄)

“Humph,” Maxim sneers. “How large is your protractsis? Can you house three offspring at once?”

(Oh my, Zolnax! What DID you get yourself into??? 😱)

Zolnax puts on a fake smile and says in his head, “Eheheh…Creator, you can help me out of this situation, can’t you?”

(Hey, you chose her! But I’ll try to influence them not to put three babies inside you. Yeesh! Tell him you can only have two at the most. You do want to get it over with, right?)

“Twins is my limit, unfortunately,” Zolnax answers. “But I’d prefer one at a time.”

Maxim grimaces. “What a waste of resources. I will have to inspect his protractsis for myself.”

(I can only IMAGINE what he means by that! 👀)

*****

Now it’s time to visit Zolnax’s parents. And since June didn’t get to meet Medusa, this should be fun!

(For us…heh heh…)

June surveys Zolnax’s parents’ home. “Your progenitor’s hive looks much like the hull of a blandnarth death wasp on the planet Coorn.”

(That’s a good thing, right?)

Zolnax opens the door and enters first. “Mom, Dad, it is I! Your favorite son. And I’ve brought home the winner!”

(She’s your fiance, Zolnax, not the winner. ***Slaps face***)

Medusa’s lip lifts slightly. “Which one did you choose? I hope it’s the one with the eyes like a viper. She impressed me the most.”

(Is she talking about Jena? 🤷‍♀️)

“Even better!” Zolnax answers. “The beautiful alien sex goddess. And her parents are going to help me take over the world.”

“That’s nice of them, dear.”

June smiles and adds, “As soon as the incubation period begins.”

(Heh heh, Zolnax. You’re gonna be so preggers so fast! 😜)

Just then Hunter enters the room. “Ah, son! You chose my favorite! With her rocking body, you won’t have to stray elsewhere.”

He pats Zolnax on the back. “I’m so proud of you. Way to keep the Rex manly torch aflame.”

(I wonder what he’ll say when he sees Zolnax has a bun in the oven. 🤣)

Bealzabix walks over with her iPad. “According to my calculations, Zolnax is going to incubate for eighteen months, if the aliens have their way.”

(Uh…why is it so creepy that Bealzie knows everything? 😬)

Medusa orders, “Sweetheart, put that thing down and greet your future sister-in-law.”

Bealzie grins evilly. “It’ll be my pleasure to shake the hand of the genius who’s going to make my brother puke his guts out, feel like crap for nine months and squirt out a bunch of screaming poop factories.”

Zolnax glares. “Shut up, half pint, before I blot you out of my will.”

*****

Now that the family niceties are over (if you can call it that), June is hungry and starts cooking hamburgers while Zolnax gets ready for a swim.

Hunter walks out onto the patio and jolts. “Um…June? What is happening to my son?”

She takes a bite of her hamburger then says, “It is only my male progenitor. He wishes to have an exploratory incubation meeting with Zolnax.”

“No…wait!” Zolnax shouts as a beam of light lifts him off his feet.

“I’m not ready!” He floats toward the space ship, flailing. “We’re not even….MARRIED!”

(Too late, Zolnax. Bahahahahaaaa! 😝)